Rise Leaders Radio
#58 A Fool’s Choice: Achievement or Evolution with Donna Zajonc

#58 A Fool’s Choice: Achievement or Evolution with Donna Zajonc

April 26, 2022

If we focus on goals alone, without being tethered into this beingness, [it] can activate and trigger us, and we see those goals as our persecutor…‘Was the goal big enough? Did I do it fast enough?’ So the goal-setting can actually become a persecutor. And in our own mind, we feel victim to that.” – Donna Zajonc

 

Are your goals also your persecutor?

Working toward a goal or vision is important - but how often do we pay as much attention to the person that we're being while in that pursuit, as the pursuit itself?

 

It’s easy to get caught up in the goal without placing attention on who we are along the way. However, without tending to ourselves we can feel trapped by our own goals and wonder if we’re living up to the standards we’ve set. Distress and reactive behaviors follow.

 

Donna Zajonc covers this topic in her new book, Who Do You Want to Be on the Way to What You Want.

 

Alongside her partner, David Emerald, they’ve developed a framework for recognizing and responding more intentionally when life throws us a curve ball. We learn to move out of the toxicity of the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT), and how to reorient ourselves with the The Empowerment Dynamic (TED).

 

We’ll discuss her new book, along with 3 powerful practices for you to use to look inward, spur creativity and conquer stress.

 

Tangled up in your emotions? Notice and name

[00:28:21] “When we notice and name something, we are now able to see it and hold it in our hand and go, ‘Oh, look at that.’ We're not as enmeshed into it, so we're not subject to it. It’s really a powerful psychodynamic thing that's going on, that allows us to have it and not be it…when we can do that, our body starts calming down.”

 

Stuck? Tell 3 stories

[00:30:50] “When we're really stuck and attached to a particular point of view, we’re constricted in our bodies, our minds are constricted - and we are totally lost to the creativity of any other possibility. So we literally must broaden our perspective. That's really hard to do when we're stuck in one perspective. The practice of the possibility of telling three stories [helps you realize] there's even more going on here than I realized.”

 

Create space and see what space creates

[00:39:24] “[Leaders often feel they] need to be able to tell people more ideas about how to fix this or be that. And it's actually the opposite - to let go of needing to have the answers and to create a safe space for others to step into their genius, their creator, their sense of who do they want to be. … Let's take a timeout let's breathe, let's calm ourselves, and trust that our wisdom is going to rise if we can calm ourselves.”

 

Resources:

Donna Zajonc donna@theempowermentdynamic.com,

Who do You Want to Be on the Way to What You Want? https://bookshop.org/a/16835/9781733678100

Center for the Empowerment Dynamic:  https://www.theempowermentdynamic.com/

Link to coach training in May 2022:  https://www.theempowermentdynamic.com/coaching-2/

Episode 51 Focus 2022: From Surviving to Thriving with 3 Vital Questions (Replay from February 2020):  https://rise-leaders.com/podcast/

Rise Leaders YouTube channel:  https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKZAhRU1iLsXYwpvCECVreg

To discuss executive coaching, leadership development program design, and workshop facilitation, please visit:

https://rise-leaders.com/contact-info/

#51 Focus 2022: From Surviving to Thriving with 3VQ

#51 Focus 2022: From Surviving to Thriving with 3VQ

January 11, 2022

“When we focus on outcomes and take creative steps to go after that, we solve problems in service to those. It’s not that the Outcome Orientation is all goodness and light and problem free, but that we can tackle the problems that stand in the way of we really want and really care about.” – David Emerald Womeldorff

A 2022 Mindset Goal: An Outcome Orientation

As we dive into a new year, David Emerald Womeldorff’s discussion of problem mindset versus outcome mindset and the 3 Vital Questions is more relevant than ever. It’s why I’ve recapped this popular episode from 2020, especially as we prepare to tackle fresh challenges.

David discusses how all leadership begins with self-leadership, and how our mindset paves the way to a desired path. When we approach situations with a problem orientation, it drives anxious, reactive behavior and causes drama. In contrast, an outcome orientation keeps us focused on our passion: what we want to create and what’s supporting and aligning with our desired outcome.

As the author of The Power of TED and 3 Vital Questions: Transforming Workplace Drama, David makes complex topics easier to understand through his story-telling superpower.

Revisiting this conversation reminds me of the power of resilience in the face of organizational challenges and refreshes me as I plan my 2022.

Be the Victor, Not the Victim

[24:36] “There are two major components to our stepping into and developing our capability as creators. One is to create outcomes. The second is that we as Creators own our capacity to choose our response to whatever is going on in our lives."

Create and Generate

[33:32] “What actions are you taking? Are you merely reacting to the problems of the moment, or are you taking creative and generative action, including the solving of problems in service to outcomes?”

[35:03] “The three basic steps of dynamic tension are first and foremost, focus on the outcome and to be as clear as we can on the outcome, that the outcome can sometimes be clear and concrete – other times it may be more vague and directional.”
 

Resources mentioned in this episode:
3 Vital Questions website:
https://bit.ly/2Nsz927
The Power of TED: The Empowerment Dynamic:
https://bit.ly/3sM9eCE
3 Vital Questions:Transforming Workplace Drama
David Emerald
Donna Zajonc
Stephen Karpman's Drama Triangle
Bob Anderson's episode on Rise Leaders Radio
The Leadership Circle Profile
Robert Fritz:  Structural Tension
Rise Leaders' newsletter:  https://mailchi.mp/426e78bc9538/subscribe

#45: 7 Elements of a Winning Culture: Foosball isn‘t one of them

#45: 7 Elements of a Winning Culture: Foosball isn‘t one of them

September 28, 2021

“There’s 10.1 million positions open [in the post-COVID workforce], there is this great resignation, a great reconsideration: What am I doing? Do I feel attached to my company? Do I feel like I have purpose?” – Mike Sullivan, CEO of the LOOMIS Agency

The 7 Elements of Great Culture
The pandemic changed the landscape of the working world as we know it. Team members’ priorities have shifted into focus, and in much of the workforce, there has been a mass exodus as they search for companies that align with their purpose or values.

One element that can provide stability and longevity against this backdrop of rapid change is culture. As the CEO of The LOOMIS Agency, Mike Sullivan knows this firshand. Culture is a hallmark of strength in an organization that team members overwhelmingly respond well to. The proof is in the pudding: LOOMIS retained all team members during and after the pandemic.

My previous discussion with Mike Sullivan established why a strong culture matters. Now we’re delving into what it looks like with his 7 elements of a great culture, pulled from his and Michael Tuggle’s book, The Voice of the Underdog: How Challenger Brands Achieve Success through Culture.

Culture Starts with Safety
[05:23] “Until people feel like they are safe, and they can bring their full selves to their employment situation, they're not going to be as concerned about tapping into a purpose at work, for example, which is the second [element of culture] – what is it that I'm here to do?”

Don’t forget clients also attract (or detract from) security:

[17:53] “One of the things that I focus on is, again, the kind of clients that you bring into an organization. What I was trying to do when I built my culture was create stability, first and foremost. So if a situation is stable, if your work environment is stable, now you feel safer, now you feel more connected, now you feel like you belong.”

Connection is Founded on Communication
[07:20] “Communication is leadership … if you’ll slow it down, and let folks know, ‘I don't have all the answers. Nobody seems to have all the answers. But give me your feedback, help me set our policy.’ And inviting them into that discussion, I think is really powerful.”

Creativity Changes the Game
[15:56] “There is no problem that can't be solved with creativity. But all the other things need to be in place to be on top of your game from a creative standpoint. You really do need to feel like you belong, you have a sense of purpose like, ‘This is going in the right direction. I feel good about the people I work with – now I’m able to bring my full self.’ And that's when creativity catches fire.”

For further exploration:
 
Mike Sullivan:  https://www.linkedin.com/in/mikesullivanatloomis/
The LOOMIS Agency: https://theloomisagency.com
The Voice of the Underdog: How Challenger Brands Create Distinction by thinking Culture First https://theloomisagency.com/challengerbook
https://theloomisagency.com/blog/getting-company-culture-right-post-covid/
The Voice of the Underdog Podcast:
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-voice-of-the-underdog/id1567247656
HOW THE PANDEMIC NOW ENDS:
https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2021/08/delta-has-changed-pandemic-endgame/619726/

To discuss executive coaching, leadership development program design, and workshop facilitation, please visit:
https://rise-leaders.com/contact-info/

#42 What if Sales IS the Center of the Universe?

#42 What if Sales IS the Center of the Universe?

August 17, 2021

Look at sales in a very simple definition - that is delivering value for what someone needs. If you look at sales in that light, that’s a very noble profession. It starts with helping make sure that companies have the right people in their organization and Sales[people] who have the right knowledge, mindset, approach, cultural fit for the business, but also work with other areas of business.” - Chris Goade

Aligning Sales and company culture

Sales is arguably the face of the business – and foundational to an organization's success. It’s intrinsically connected to each function of the business, interfaces directly with customers, and delivers the revenue and profits necessary for growth. This is why it’s critical to develop solid sales processes and talent.

Chris Goade is the co-founder of 360 Consulting and saw an untapped market to build, rebuild, and restructure sales organizations while developing its people. He discusses the importance of a sales culture and that it aligns with company culture. This happens by finding the right people, building the right processes, and nurturing cross-functional relationships.

When done well, this creates a win-win relationship for the business and the customer.

People, Mindset, Process

 [11:09] “Work to make sure you have the right people, the right mindset, a clear understanding from everyone in the organization of what you do in sales: How do we develop leads? How do we articulate our value proposition? How do we create winning relationships?...It's a process like accounting, production, operations.”

About CRMs

[17:26] “If you start off with, 'do we have the right tool configured correctly? Do we have the right processes in there? And always keep an eye on what the ultimate goal is - this changes the whole belief system around what a CRM can mean for your business.”

Change driven by Goals and supported with Accountability

[18:54] “Get participation from everyone on the team…And now it's not just someone saying, ‘Hey, you're gonna do this,’ or ‘This is policy’… that's a whole different kind of mindset and position to come from when you start to hold people accountable…
“We don’t change for the sake of change, but change to get to the goals. … [When] they have some ownership in that in that change, then it's not so scary.”

 

For further exploration:

360 Consulting DFW : https://www.360consultingdfw.com/
Chris Goade Linked In https://www.linkedin.com/in/chris-goade-535b2831/
 
To discuss executive coaching, leadership development program design, and workshop facilitation, please visit:
https://rise-leaders.com/contact-info/

#37 Intimacy, Self-Orientation & Fear | A Deep Dive Into Trust

#37 Intimacy, Self-Orientation & Fear | A Deep Dive Into Trust

April 6, 2021

"If we insist on being buttoned up, polished professionals, that gets us a certain distance in our business lives. But showing up as a human being and being willing to relate to our clients and our colleagues as human beings, not just as professionals, gets us 10 times further.” - Andrea Howe

Strong connections build trust
Andrea Howe kicks conventional business to the curb and transforms how people work together. Augmenting our talk with Charlie Green in episode 36, Andrea helps us take a deep dive into the foundations of trust for us to accomplish this.
 
Building trust can feel risky. It requires shedding protective mechanisms to reveal vulnerability and, as a result, make human connections. In the workplace this often spurs fear. After all, it can be a tough balancing act to appear competent and set professional boundaries while also taking opportunities to let our guard down and reveal ourselves. Fear also inhibits true connection because it magnifies self-orientation. We can’t truly be there for others if we allow our own fear to take hold and guide our interactions.  

As you’ll discover, these 3 elements are interwoven, but when they’re examined, you can see how an awareness of them helps a novel way of working and thriving unfold.

Face fear
[14:37] “Human beings, professionals, struggle with fear…[sometimes] it’s a subtle, insidious force that has us suddenly doing or saying things that maybe aren't the optimal from a trust-building standpoint. But it's pervasive, and I think it's critical for us to attend to…we’ve got to shine some light on it, normalize it, practice ways to manage it and mitigate it, and therefore be able to show up not only more powerfully in a more grounded and centered way, but also more courageously.”
[28:01] “So think about it, when we're in a fear-based place, even if it's subtle, the ability to really tune in to another human being is compromised.”

Intimacy builds a safe haven
[31:16] “In looking at the data we've collected over more than a decade now, those with the highest intimacy scores tend to also have the highest trustworthiness scores…
“If there isn't safety in a relationship…if you're my client, what's the likelihood that you're going to disclose to me or even be willing to explore with me the real issues? What really needs to be attended to? What you're really concerned about are what your fears are.”

Generosity: The antidote to fear
[39:51] “Be willing to give stuff away. Give away ideas. Give things away. And that doesn't mean not valuing your services [or] charging appropriately for your services. But one of the best ways for people to have an experience of who you are is to get a little taste of it. So why not be willing to invest, give them a little demo…a way of getting to know you, who you are, and what you're capable of.”

Resources:
Linked In: https://www.linkedin.com/in/andrea-howe-she-her-22a105/
Trusted Advisor Associates: https://trustedadvisor.com/
The Get Real Project: https://thegetrealproject.com/
(Upcoming Webinar): https://trustedadvisor.com/webinars
The Trusted Advisor Fieldbook: https://trustedadvisor.com/books/the-trusted-advisor-fieldbook

Episode 36: A Way of Being for Sustainable Sales Success:  Focus on Trust, Courage, Intimacy: https://rise-leaders.com/podcast/?ppplayer=2166354b3000fc311ad1272907939efb&ppepisode=abad7dfecb82a6462b25f83e0101fc4d
Trust Equation Guide: https://rise-leaders.com/trust-equation-guide-2/ 

 

To subscribe to the Rise Leaders newsletter for more resources:
https://mailchi.mp/426e78bc9538/subscribe
To discuss executive coaching, leadership development program design, and workshop facilitation, please visit:
https://rise-leaders.com/contact-info/

#16. High Fidelity Conversations: Nine elements to launch culture change

#16. High Fidelity Conversations: Nine elements to launch culture change

August 18, 2020

These types of conversations are High Fidelity because they provide strength and resonance for the people who engage in them.  They’re designed to support the Core Ideology of the organization and especially support the people experiencing the change. LeeAnn describes nine elements important for launching these conversations.

 

“Waiting until you have created the perfect, most elegant solution keeps you out of today’s game. Launch it!” 

High Fidelity Conversations Support Culture Change

Organizations are constantly changing due to both internal and external events.

Mergers and acquisitions, disruptive technology, and various economic pressures, like those brought on by the Covid pandemic are prime examples. This year, in addition to facing a pandemic, the US had to deal with hard truths on racial injustice, and the need to address the topic in the workplace was no longer avoidable.

On a previous Podcast episode, How to Talk About Race at Work, Drew Clancy and Lori Bishop shared how they tackled the topic head-on at PCI.  They explained why they didn’t wait for the perfect long-term solution to address concerns about race and how they tied the conversations to their values and focus on increasing trust throughout the organization.

Whether your goal is to step fully into conversations about race, or to committing to the successful adaptation of a critical change to your culture, it’s important to provide strength, alignment, and resonance, – or fidelity – for the people who engage in them.

Do you know how to provide the proper framework for these delicate conversations?

This entire episode has been created to guide leaders on how to begin culture change in their organization by following these nine actionable concepts for designing high fidelity conversations.

A Few Elements from the Guide Described in the Episode

05:52 - "Create a vision that everyone can see themselves in. And what that means is, create a compelling future that matters for people. People need to see how the change is going to benefit them and the organization long term." 

07:26 - "And with conversations, that means listening and learning and being open to other points of view."

10:36 - "Waiting will keep you out of the game today. And you want to balance this immediate action with the longer-term creation of policies and structures that provide resistance-free solutions."

11:43 - "Naming the effort gives people language for how to refer to the change".

For more resources highlighted in this audio episode please follow the links below:

Episode 15: How to Talk About Race at Work
https://rise-leaders.com/how-to-talk-about-race-at-work/

Launching Culture Change through Hi-Fidelity Conversations guide:

https://rise-leaders.com/hi-fi-conversations-icons/

To discuss executive coaching, leadership development program design and workshop facilitation please visit:
https://rise-leaders.com/contact-info/

 

To subscribe to the Rise Leaders newsletter for more resources: https://mailchi.mp/426e78bc9538/subscribe

#01. Jennifer Touchet’s Visionary Leadership and Creating A Win-Win-Win

#01. Jennifer Touchet’s Visionary Leadership and Creating A Win-Win-Win

June 26, 2019

Season 1 of Rise Leaders Radio is focused on a unique type of entrepreneurial leadership that happens in Oak Cliff (Dallas, TX) at the community, business and civic levels. Jennifer Touchet kicks off the storytelling by sharing how Twelve Hills Nature Center was envisioned, fought for and created by the community. It’s a story of win-win-win with a variety of stakeholders, shared vision, positive politics and power.

 

Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it’s the only thing that ever has.

– Margaret Mead

 

I begin Season 1 by interviewing Jennifer Touchet.  She played a pivotal role in saving a parcel of land that was slated for re-development at the end of the street where I now live. I was not expecting to learn such deep and transferable lessons from her. I knew by reading the donor names and invocation inscribed in a rock at the entrance of Twelve Hills Nature Center that a significant effort had been undertaken and that someone(s) had been in charge. Jennifer shares wisdom that is useful for anyone, anywhere, leading change.

EASTER EGG ALERT!  Stay tuned to the end of this episode to hear my visit to Seedschool, a small school that convenes weekly at Twelve Hills in a converted bus named Matilda. The owner, Jennifer Stuart, is another Oak Cliff Hero.  You’ll be delighted by sounds of children learning!

Takeaways from our conversation:

  • Use a communication style that invites other perspectives. 
  • Acknowledge that there are multiple stakeholders.  Understand where the power and influence are and who has it through Power Mapping when you’re leading change. 
  • Start with a shared vision and let it evolve. 
  • Use inclusive strategies to widen the circle and increase engagement.
  • Adopt a ‘win≠ winner take all’ core belief. 
  • Consider that there are no permanent enemies and no permanent allies.
  • Commit for the long term. 

Links:

Power-mapping:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Power_mapping

Follow Twelve Hills Nature Center:

https://twelvehills.org/

Follow Seedschool:

http://www.seedpreschool.org/

Connect to Jennifer:

https://bit.ly/2M92Q7E

 

To subscribe to the Rise Leaders newsletter for more resources: https://mailchi.mp/426e78bc9538/subscribe

To discuss executive coaching, leadership development program design, and workshop facilitation, please visit: https://rise-leaders.com/contact-info/

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