Rise Leaders Radio

#40 Try the ‘blend’ : A practice to build stronger relationships and deeper trust

July 13, 2021

“When we’re blending, we felt in lockstep, we were in flow. Perhaps we even felt like the conversation was a nice dance. We felt open, connected with, 'gotten'…When we are able to blend, we have stronger relationships that are based on deeper trust.”

 

'Blend' to build stronger relationships

In a society that seems to value being right and accomplishing tasks quickly, a willingness to engage in the difficult work of connecting with what others care about is a game-changing mindset. Blending is one means of accomplishing this: an authentic willingness to be open to another person’s concerns, move with them, to hear and understand their perspective.

This week we’re looking at what blending is (and isn’t); how to sense it; and how to observe, reflect, and practice it.

What Blending Isn't:

[3:42] “When we're having an experience of not blending or not being blended with, we may say that we feel pushed into something. We might feel stiff-armed or kept at a distance. We feel like we had the rug pulled out from underneath us.”

Observation Before Action

[6:07] “The magic in all of this is in raising our self-awareness so that we can catch ourselves when we're blending well, and not so much.”

[8:38] “Observe yourself. Notice the situations where you blend well. And when you don't, I've given you clues already to look for: when you jump in to fix, advise or shut something down, or when you move into complying and pleasing.”

 

Center, Calibrate and Connect

 [10:57] “When you're actually in the blending conversation, connect to what you care about. Center yourself physically, release tension, calibrate your nervous system. Now connect with the other person and engage by asking questions and attempting to expand your own perspective.”

For further exploration:

Rise Leaders Radio Episodes focused on embodiment: #32 Speak Up Stand Up:  Chris Johnson on Becoming Fierce; #25 The Leadership Pause with Chris Johnson (www.rise-leaders.com/podcast)

Pushing Hands - An embodied exercise:  Wikipedia https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pushing_hands

"Embodied Leadership: The Somatic Approach to Developing Your Leadership" – Pete Hamill https://bookshop.org/a/16835/9780749465643

"The Leadership Dojo: Build Your Foundation as an Exemplary Leader" – Richard Strozzi-Heckler https://bookshop.org/a/16835/9781583942017

To discuss executive coaching, leadership development program design, and workshop facilitation, please visit:
https://rise-leaders.com/contact-info/

 

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